Thursday, August 2, 2012

Regal

About a year ago, I bought some fabric.
A remnant, to be more specific.
Two and two thirds yards of a sheer, pukey green muslin.
My mother was all like, "What are your plans for that?"

At the time, I was optimistic.

A skirt!
A cardigan! OMG I've never sewed a cardigan before!
A breezy little sundress!
A tank I can layer!
Oh the possibilities!

And now I see why she asked.

The remnant I bought with it was also sheer, but it was a lovely pink that I fully intend to make a top with because of its versatility:


Granted, I didn't pay much for the barfy verde, but I did not consider the limits of its potential in my asinine school-girl spending spree.

Here is everything wrong with the fabric:

1. It's the color of vomit. (Have I mentioned this previously?)
2. It's very lightweight and see-through which means anything I make with it will have to have lining or be double-layered. (because, I mean, what's the point of clothes if they don't cover what they ought to, eh, A&F?)
3. It wrinkles easily.
4. It probably won't go with anything I own because I don't wear upchuck-colored clothing.
5. It smells funny. I expected Wal-Mart remnants to be newer-smelling than the thrift store finds, but so far that has not been the case.

And it makes me wonder.
(Led Zeppelin ftw)
Why was this even a remnant in the first place? Someone actually bought the preceding 7 yards or so? What did they do with it? Do they wear it in public?

Never have I ever been so stumped by a textile.
I just don't know what I can DO with it to make it useful!

One option I suppose would be a practice fabric.
Stuff to try stuff out on.

Another option is to give it to the Benjamin cause and let it be a diaper.
It won't look much different when there's poo all over it.

I don't know.
I just feel like anything I make with it is going to be an eyesore.

But my latest project is not!

Though, that face kind of is an eyesore. #apologies


Skirt still to come. Hanging it from the lights is the closest thing I have to a dressmaker's mannequin. #unemployment

I even made myself a logo:

For, you know, when I make it all big on the upper-east-side. #sarcasm

So maybe if I just keep being successful with my other projects, then the booger fabric might come around to be something worthwhile. If not, at least it will always be a joke.

I once had a fear of hurdles.
But then I got over it.

Laugh out loud,
TWS

3 comments:

  1. I suppose you could always shred it and use it as kitty litter. Remember Fuzzball?

    I like your vagina shirt and your logo.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It's a nice shirt. I'm just calling it like I see it...

    ReplyDelete