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This is the wallpaper in the lobby at work:

Only yesterday did it occur to me that thousands of owls were watching.

Never will I be the same again.

Pin me,
TWS

Deodorant

Does anyone remember libraries?

I remember libraries.

As a kid, libraries were fun places to go with my mom. Especially the one in Centerville with all the cool furniture.
As I got a little older, libraries were still really fun to go on the weekends. Maybe rent an audio book, buy a magazine, think about books.

When I got to middle and high school, the library was where it was at.
And I misuse the language emphatically. Artistic's license and whatnot.
Books were fantastic. I would hardly ever be caught without a book.
Libraries were equally fantastic. In high school, it was a great place to hang out because only quiet, smart people were in there. All the boisterous meatheads stayed outside.  And David B. would cut out the Sudoku in the morning paper for me.

And then college happened, which sort of ruined libraries for me.
Don't get me wrong- GSU has an awesome library.
But while my freshman year was about checking out books and reading them by the fake fireplace on the third floor, my junior/senior years were about tax research, ERP configuration projects, and "meeting with my group" for BAM.

A lot of terrible memories were made in that library.

And the fact that it's open almost 24/7 is just creepy.

It's amazing to me how libraries just CHANGED for me. They went from being a place of whimsical inspiration to stressful headaches.

I want them to go back to being places of whimsical inspiration.

Like this:

I hereby dedicate this post to my BFF, Beth, because it is her birthday today and also because she secretly wants to be a librarian when she grows up.

In other news, I ate a carrot today, and it tasted kind of like a cucumber.
It was horrible.

Ma chere Mademoiselle,
TWS

Urgost's Lair

I don't know if you guys know this or not, but Mike and I have been waking up at 5:45 every weekday morning, going to the gym, and running.

That's right. Running.

Last week I accomplished so much because on Monday, I passed 1/4 of the CPA exam!
And then Tuesday through Thursday, I RAN A MILE. Like- straight.
No walking. No dying.
Just running.

The first day we did this, we got back to the house pretty early (6:40), so we decided to take a power nap before work.

It is, by far, one of the best feelings in the world.
Why? When you sleep 8 hours straight, you don't get to enjoy the fact that you're sleeping because as soon as you wake up, you have to start being a person.

But when you get up early, go do something, and then realize that you can go back to sleep for another hour or so before you have to start being a person?
A conscious joy floods your soul.

Consequently, we've been waking up that early on purpose just so we can take that empyrean nap. It also gives me something to look forward to when I'm running besides sore abs and legs.

So, in conclusion:
*sing like the Folgers commercial*
The best part of waking up--is going back to sleep!

And then, yeah, I guess coffee,
TWS

Podiatry

I wonder, when Jesus washed the disciples feet, if they were ticklish.

John 13:6-9
He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, "Lord, are you going to wash my feet?"
Jesus replied, "You do not realized now what I am doing, but later you will understand."
"No," said Peter. "You will never wash my feet."

*Jesus starts washing his feet*
Then Peter giggled. heehee. STOP. HAHAHA OMIGOSH STOP IT. DUDE- THAT TICKLES SO BAD!!!!

Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no part with me."
"Then, Lord, " Simon Peter replied, "not just my feet but my head and hands as well!"

It just makes a little more personal if John had written in the part where the disciples were ticklish.

Because they had to be.
I mean, they were human, right?
And they had nerves in their feet, right?

My name is Allie. And this is what I think about.

Like a drum, baby, don't stop beating,
TWS

Gone Gone Gone; Phillip Phillips

^great song
^and, yeah, that's his real name.

Fuzz

Five surprising things that annoy me:

1. "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison

Especially when I wake up with that really stupid part in my head.
"SHALALALALA BIT BAI BIT BAI BIT BAI LA TE DA!"

And then when he actually starts saying words:

"ANDWHATEVERAPPENED. TO TUESDAY AND SO SLOW."

I don't even know what that could mean, if anything.

2. Fortune cookies

I hate that nasty crinkly little wrapper.
I hate the crunchy texture.
I hate the taste.
I hate that little forture inside.
I hate the lottery numbers on the back of the little fortune inside.

I don't know why.

3. Paper shopping bags

Because if I have to carry my groceries in my arms, I might as well not have a bag.

I don't know if it's because I bring my own bags, but whenever my two canvas bags fill up, the bag people think that I will get all offended if they start putting my stuff in plastic.
So they put it in paper.

But if you look at the facts, paper bags don't make sense:

FACT #1: Trash goes to landfills. In the end, it doesn't matter if it's paper/plastic because the term "biodegradable" is only applicable in compost heaps. Things are not supposed to biodegrade in a landfill because it is too tightly packed. True story.

FACT #2: Plastic bags are more recyclable in my household than paper bags. What am I going to do with a paper bag? Draw a scary face on it, sit on my grandparents porch, hold a basket of candy on Halloween and scare kids?

Ok, yes, I did that. But that has been the only use of one paper bag.

FACT #3: THE TREES, MAN.

So, in reality, plastic > paper.

4. When people use ellipses instead of periods

Exhibit A: excerpt from an actual work e-mail

Please see attached…let me know if you need anything else…thanks.

 

It's like a run-on sentence that has the hiccups.

5. Skirts that are longer in the back than they are in the front

It's pretty much the mullet of spring fashion.

Brown-eyed girl,
TWS

Lines

Today, I called a fax machine by accident.

TWS